We, sometimes, in a kind of paradox, where we are urged to have wings and fight for our dreams, travel for them if necessary, even knowing that this implies leaving our home, friends and, many times, to our parents and grandparents alone. “Each person has their circumstances,” says Pilar Río (Betanzos, 1965).

She, however, did not hesitate to decide between being with her mother or living elsewhere. When he was 18, his father died of cancer and his mother, Antonia Sabín (1930), he would have stayed alone near Paderne, Betanzos, if not because Pili, as everyone knows her, looked for a job that allowed him to live with her. Antonia from that moment dedicated himself to the field to continue keeping the home after the death of her husband.

Antonia and Gerardo Río had been married for 30 years. He was a blacksmith and had a workshop at home. She dedicated himself to the home and the garden. They married in 1954 and eleven years later they had Pili, their only daughter.

“Both put their part to not have children then,” explains Pili, although at the time of pregnancy, his father wanted a man who could inherit the workshop. While Antonia hastened to clarify: «The loving foi moi with Ela. Traballou Maito, Maito, ”he says.

When he died, they sold the iron to the scrap metal and the space where the workshop was like a ship they currently use to store things. Antonia was in charge and with the work of the field he managed to get Pili forward. “Sement onions, patacas, leitugas, fabas, millo …”, is proud, and also mentions the support of the neighbors, who helped him with Leira at the time of Gerardo’s death.

History of Pili

Pili was then in A Coruña studying to be an administrative assistant and, once he finished, he returned to Paderne to work in a cooperative.

Her mother, meanwhile, dedicated himself to the field. Some time later, Pili married and had Candela, his only daughter. “My mother told me that I could not with the work of the field and help me with Candela at the same time, so I decided Also in the care of Antonia.

Life allowed Pili to take care of his mother, who is now 92 years old. «Our circumstances were special. When Mom was a widow, I looked for a close job, in a cooperative. I have always lived with her. That is why living without my mother would be very difficult. We have a very large link. I understand that there are people who have other circumstances and that work cannot live with their parents, but in my case, I do not conceive not to take care of my mother at home, ”says Pili.

Living with her allowed him to learn from the field. «The most valuable, in addition to the company, is all that can teach me. Life experience is worth a lot. I knew of numbers, but not from the field, ”explains Pili, who once at home, also learned everything related to crops.

As for Candela, his granddaughter, living with his grandmother, ”he says, has allowed him to collect memories from early childhood. «The first memory I have as a child is her bathing, or again that, being very small that we went to collect eggs and, as I did not know they were so delicate, I threw them. She gave me a sermon that I couldn’t do it, ”he tells tenderly. “It’s not just about specific moments. My grandmother has taken care of me a lot,” he clarifies, excited, his granddaughter.

Not Everything is Perfect

Candela and Pili know that, like any situation, it now has its pros and cons. «It’s not about making care a romantic vision and saying that everything is perfect, it is not. In fact, we are very similar and discuss. If I did not live with her, maybe these discussions would not happen, but if there were not all these friction, there would not be room for love, ”argues Candela, the youngest of these three women who make pineapple.

So between care and hours in the garden, the calm days spend, with the assurance that Candela has grown with the best example, in Pilar’s words: honesty and the value of work.

Despite the years, Antonia is still very active and explains her day. «Pili érgue me; Dress me, and despis xa veño for miña horta cun saquiño small to remove herbas and work. Eu Sempre Fun Amiga do Campo, because I like everything. But agora fóiseme to Forza. As Maito de Moza danced, Agora unbelievanme as pernas, ”jokes Antonia, who despite the years, insists on continuing to take care of his garden, which after all was his livelihood. “He is very active and gets angry if he has nothing to do,” explains his daughter.

“The best teaching you can leave to Candela is responsibility,” says Pili, and her daughter Secunda. «More than telling me, I learned with the example. My grandmother worked all her life in the countryside, which is very hard, but she loved it. That allowed him to have the life he wanted, more than economically, in terms of having a trade that makes her happy. She worked from sun to sun a long time so that we could have opportunities and that has made me aware that it could not be useless, in the sense of not striving for anything. His teaching is: ‘Find a job that makes you happy and do everything you can to dedicate to it,” says Candela.

So in his house they have followed the example of his grandmother, his mother with the countryside, where they still collect chasa Galician that they sell, and where they have chickens and the garden for self -consumption. Candela, meanwhile, studied law, made a master’s degree and today exercised as a journalist. «She was raised with great freedom. She has to make her own decisions. If you want to fly alone, you have the nest open, ”says Pili.

The daughter, however, is very clear that freedom does not imply forgetting her origins. «You can have wings and roots perfectly. Follow your dreams, be independent, but that is why you have to put aside people who have dedicated a lot of time to take care of you. I sit with my grandmother to play cards, maybe an hour, but I know she dedicated more time to me as a child, ”he says.

“The best gift you can make to an older person is time,” he continues, “will value him more than anyone. What makes it the most happy is to spend time with her, even watching football. That makes them feel valued, which are not an old rag, which you consider and are important for you ».

That thought, which he learned at home, has been the one that his mother has transmitted to him and the one who has also provided them with so many joys: the company, the teachings and the happiness of seeing his grandmother well with them.

«As I ran out of a father, I always consider enjoying time with my mother, who, thank God, has been Longeva. I really enjoy the stories that he tells me, even if he repeats them, ”Pili laughs, although he also recognizes that both work, humidity and cold have taken its toll on the body of his mother, which, despite having no ailment Severe, it has been in tow for 92 years. “Eu Esou Velliña, Velliña,” says Antonia. “Belliña with B, of Bella,” Pili caresses her.

This article is originally published on .lavozdegalicia.es